The race just happened to finish when you were at the front
‘No, Tom, you didn’t win. The race just happened to finish when you were at the front.’
Mark Wood
Wednesday
She’s been unbearable
‘She’s been unbearable since she started the Ozempic.’
Wednesday
All children follow social media influencers, but Robert Jenrick?
‘I know all children follow social media influencers, but Robert Jenrick?’
Are we there yet?
‘Are we there yet? I’ve got a food delivery order to pick up.’
50% off all strawberry vapes
Wednesday
We’re spending the day with my Dad
‘We’re spending the day with my Dad – he gets lonely on his own.’
Wednesday
Take me to your fat jabs
‘Take me to your fat jabs.’
Wednesday
Wednesday
They’re not very inclusive
‘They’re not very inclusive.’
Apparently they have to be careful
‘Apparently they have to be careful. People just swoop in and steal food.’
Wednesday
I forget, are we living with you, or are you still living with us?
‘I forget, are we living with you, or are you still living with us?’
Wednesday
You can just sell the Tesla
‘Well, we can work to address this feeling of shame, or you can just sell the Tesla.’
Argh! Influencers!
‘Argh! Influencers!’
Wednesday
What do your parents feel about us moving in together?
‘What do your parents feel about us moving in together? Have they got room?’
Wednesday
We need a photo for proof of delivery
‘We need a photo for proof of delivery.’
I think it’s another article written by AI
‘I think it’s another article written by AI.’
Wednesday
I was sent to Hell
‘I was sent to Hell, but it was affecting my mental health.’
You had it easy with children, Mum – no ADHD, depression or anxiety
‘You had it easy with children, Mum – no ADHD, depression or anxiety.’