Alex Massie

The first thing to be said of a test in which a side batting third can score 517/1 is that the wicket was not fit for test match cricket. The second is that, for once, this did not matter. Hilarity trumped common sense. None of us, not being present for the Melbourne test in 1912, can recall the 323 run stand shared by Jack Hobbs and Wilfred Rhodes but, somewhat sadly, that's now been wiped from the record books by Alastair Cook and Jonathan Trott. Actually, the wicket was worse than even 517/1 suggests. The teams combined for a score of 624/2 in the second innings. That's a Sri Lankan level of blandness and were it not for the novelty of the matter, right-thinking cricket supporters would be annoyed that a once-fascinating test match was ruined by the Gabba wicket.

Four years later than should have been the case, Andrew Strauss will skipper England in Australia. English cricket has righted itself since the Flintoff and Pietersen debacles. For a spell one sensed that marketing considerations were influencing cricketing decisions. The great strength of the present Strauss-Flower regime is that it is, in the end, almost dull. No drama, no fuss and precious little intrigue either. Australia, by contrast, are in some mild kind of flux. Where England picked their team before leaving home, Australia have been scrabbling to find players with sufficient form and fitness to justify inclusion. Xavier Doherty's inclusion seems sensible but is based more on hope and hunch than any expectation that he'll really make Kevin Pietersen his bunny.

Following this post on Fianna Fail, a Dublin correspondent cautions against underestimating the stubbornness of their hold upon the people: Fianna Fail will rise again. For two reasons: i) Fine Gael and Labour may need the support of lots of other parties to get anything done. The scope for internal disagreement is immense. It is likely that they will lose popular support very quickly if they preside over savage cuts, which they will have to do; ii) For those of us old enough to remember, Fianna Fail acted like thugs in opposition. They opposed everything (including the Anglo-Irish Agreement) and whipped up popular hysteria against the government over the smallest issue. This will work again. They will be in government again within five years. You can bank on it.

Meanwhile, elsewhere in whimsy the nice folks at Foreign Policy asked me to write a piece about Prince William's engagement. Somehow this ended up with another modest proposal: the United States should ditch the Presidency, join the Commonwealth and become a parliamentary democracy. You know, like Canada. They have the trappings of royalty already, but none of the benefits: Last year, Peggy Noonan, the American conservative commentator and former presidential speechwriter, complained that President Barack Obama lacked some of the presence that a good head of state requires.

John Rentoul may have cornered the market in Questions to which the Answer is No but there's an opening for Questions to Which the Answer is Yes. Clearly, this is a niche market. Nevertheless, Iain Dale asks numbers one and two this evening. Or, rather, the topics for his LBC radio show invite pithy responses: 8pm McCoppers: Should we be using private companies to pay for police officers to patrol city centres to control alcohol fuelled violence? 9pm Should Camilla be Queen when the time comes? Yes and Yes. A thid question  - "Don't we want politicians to speak their minds?" is out of order as I think it wants to be answered Yes. A fourth, "Are you keeping down with the Jones's?