Photos
‘He used to feed us, now he just takes photos of us.’
‘He used to feed us, now he just takes photos of us.’
‘I don’t make sandwiches so much as curate them.’
‘It gets me from alpha to beta.’
‘I’m drinking for two.’
‘You try talking to him.’
‘What do you mean you’re going to tweet it?’
‘This is a repeat of yesterday’s rant about BBC bias, and it is also available online.’
‘I’m going on after the watershed.’
‘Look, dear, he’s networking.’
The worst date ever
‘She’s got everything we never had: a two-hour commute, IVF treatment, divorce pending and an alcohol problem.’