Dave – 6 December 2012

‘Wow! Fire AND the wheel!! Renaissance man or what?’
‘It’s for the connoisseur who appreciates really tiny amounts of growth.’
‘See that? It’s trending on Twitter that you’ve been naughty, not nice.’
‘It only seems like yesterday that we packed everything away from last Christmas.’
‘This one’s for Mummy — it counts the days until it’s all over.’
‘Is it just me, or does everyone look 45p less drunk?’
‘…and everyone lived happily ever after.’
‘I’m not sure, Piglet. “Tombstoning”?’
The holly and the ID
‘Are we there yet?’
Eating
‘Shall we join the ladies?’
Munch
‘I’m also a member of Ukip.’
‘Let’s see who today’s manager is.’