Your Problems Solved | 4 December 2004

Q. At 50, I was entitled to retirement which left me free to start an easier career and I got a job as a driver/valet to a young Saudi Arabian who owns a racing stud. I enjoy the work and we get on well. As is correct, I call him ‘Sir’ and he addresses me by my surname. Trouble is, so does his personal assistant, who is posh but a slip of a girl. She does so in front of my daughter, who is older than her. How can I get her to see that I resent her calling me by my surname without upsetting the applecart? Perhaps I sound petty and ridiculous, but you have no idea how it riles me; I suppose because it makes me feel inferior and reminds me of the change in status I should have come to terms with by now.
G.M., Derbyshire

A. Next time you are alone with the slip of a girl and she addresses you by your surname, turn round pleasantly and say, ‘Look, we’ve got to know each other pretty well by now, can’t we be on Christian-name terms?’ She will be hard pushed to justify a negative response.