Dear Mary…
Q. I cannot believe that you condone the habit of ‘high-profile guests’ who keep their hosts waiting while they decide whether or not to accept an invitation (26 April). Their so-called ‘ruthless insistence on flexibility where social arrangements are concerned’ shows a weakness of self-importance. The hosts would no doubt have other guests they would like to invite instead. I cannot believe that you yourself would display such a lack of courtesy.
J.T., London SW7
A. No, I personally would not behave in this way and I regret having given the impression of condoning the practice of hedging in general. I hoped I had made clear that I was dealing only with top-of-the-range hedging, i.e., among those of presidential status. Hedging still happens in other ranks, of course, and it is antisocial. No matter how brilliant or eligible someone may be, if they hedge over lunches and dinners to which they have been invited as a specific human ‘ingredient’, invitations will swiftly dry up and they will be relegated to drinks parties only.
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