Dear Mary…
Q. What should a host do when two sets of guests are at daggers drawn? It was supposed to be a jolly house party last weekend but my sister plus family of four got on very badly with a colleague of my wife’s who had brought his family of four. The atmosphere went sour following a row over the three-minute silence, but this was really just a mask for the general dyspepsia suffered by my wife’s colleague, who drinks and eats too much and whose business is going badly. The general merriment and air of celebration which should have prevailed was effectively stymied by the stand-off. How can a host make sure people who never really meant to fall out in the first place can make friends again and still save face?
H.S., Dorset
A. For those who give large house parties it is always a good idea to keep in stock a number of scripts which can be photocopied and used for domestic play-reading entertainment. In this way the members of the ‘cast’ can transfer their aggression on to arguments about role-assignment and delivery, to say nothing of the acting out of the roles themselves. This is a way of allowing dyspeptic people to vent their spleen without it being taken personally by those upon whom it is vented, since the whole business can be passed off as being the result of possessing an artistic temperament. You will find that all manner of personal upsets can be channelled to cathartic release through the medium of play-reading in a private home. Once the veiled aggression has been expressed, the guests can get on with enjoying each other’s company without feeling residual resentment.
Q. We have a new daily lady but despite our having made it absolutely clear that she should never unplug my son’s computer, she keeps doing it, even when she has not used the Hoover in the room in question.
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