And so to a cloudy, chilly Adelaide, more like London in October than Australia in the early days of high summer, for one of the most thrilling Ashes Tests of modern times. Now the key moments in the fate of these Ashes are becoming very clear. Forget Joe Root putting Australia in, or Steve Smith’s unimaginative reluctance to give his bowlers more work and enforce the follow-on on the third day under the lights. Forget that rousing final session for England as the pink ball seamed and darted and hooped as if it were on crystal meth, and the Aussies were reduced to 53 for four. Forget even that extraordinary fightback led by Root that, for a tantalising few hours, allowed us to dream of a miraculous victory.
No, the fate of these Ashes was decided in the small hours of a late September night when Ben Stokes, the best all-round cricketer in the world and vice-captain of the national side, got into a spat with the locals outside a Bristol nightclub. It was the only place to get a drink at that time of night, so Stokes and some teammates, including Alex Hales, had clearly decided to get ‘on one’. Whatever your feelings about that — I think it was irresponsible and selfish and Stokes deserved to be severely disciplined — surely the time has come for some common sense. He was punished by England with a heavy fine and banned for two one-day matches and two Tests. But it was not English cricket’s responsibility to do the work of the police, and now the Crown Prosecution Service.
Why did the ECB indicate that Stokes would not be picked with legal proceedings pending? He obviously couldn’t pick up his bat if he were in the dock at the Bailey, or doing time, or breaking rocks in the hot sun.
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