Why can’t I simply book a swim?

It shames me to admit this, but I haven’t been near a public swimming pool for many a year. Hotel pools, yes; the sea – occasionally, in parts of the world with predictable warmth. But I have resisted the new wave of ‘wild’ swimming and was never a regular – to be honest even an irregular – at the Hampstead Ladies’ Pond. Nor have I frequented health clubs or spas, though I did go to enquire about one that had opened nearby; then came the pandemic.   

As a one-time regular pool user, I am taking another look. This is because I have just completed my four-session NHS allocation of hydrotherapy (for a broken ankle). And they bade me farewell with a wodge of papers, which include a long list of public pools all over London where I might possibly continue my hydro-regime. 

This manner of farewell, incidentally, has a name: it is something the NHS, local authorities and charities call ‘sign-posting’, and it’s an ingenious way of passing the buck.