Who’d want to survive a nuclear war?

The conflicts in Ukraine and the Middle East keep raging, Vladimir Putin has lowered the threshold required for Moscow to nuke Europe and Donald Trump is shadowboxing ahead of his return to the ring. You’d need almost divine reserves of Zen to not worry about where all this is heading.

Some people are really worried: they’re paying ‘eye-watering’ and ‘extortionate’ prices of up to £48,000 for nuclear bunkers in case the bomb drops, according to Metro. But surviving a nuclear war ‘doesn’t have to set you back thousands of pounds’, said the Daily Mail. You can build a shelter with ‘objects commonly found around the home’ like internal doors and shower curtains, according to the paper. So your ‘only expenditure’ should be ‘around £72’, on plastic sheeting and ‘a few broom handles’. Best of luck with all that. 

I tried to build a homemade nuclear bunker myself once but in my defence I was only 11 years old at the time.