Train à Grande Vexation

The marvels of French rail travel are a myth, says Ross Clark. Travelling by TGV is a rip-off — and the customer service is appalling

Which Ryanair passenger, left fuming by lousy service and lashed by Michael O’Leary’s tongue, hasn’t opined that, if only they had more money and a bit of extra time, they could glide to their holiday destination on a French TGV? Why do we insist on subjecting ourselves to the torture of budget airlines when down there, at ground level, we could be travelling on the fastest and most envied railway system in the world and one that is, according to the marketing bumf, ‘high-speed and hassle-free’?

I’ll give you a good reason: because the customer service on French Railways (SNCF) is no better than on Ryanair. The only difference is that SNCF is several times the price. If you are tempted by the TGV, my advice is to go and admire it from one of the many autoroute service stations which it passes.