Lucy Vickery

Tourist misinformation | 26 July 2018

issue 28 July 2018

In Competition No. 3058 you were invited to supply snippets of mischievously/sadistically misleading advice for foreign tourists visiting Britain, or for British ones travelling abroad.

This is an assignment that you always embrace with relish, though one competitor observed that it felt curiously difficult this time round because ‘the interaction between Britain and Abroad isn’t very funny just at the moment’.

That may well be true, but your entries still raised a chuckle, and as usual those with a ring of plausibility worked best. There was a fair amount of repetition: popular tips included the desirability of introducing Brexit into conversation at the earliest opportunity, the inadvisability of tipping black cab drivers and the National Gallery’s love of selfies.

There was also the reappearance of old favourites: the first drink in a pub is on the house; toast the landlord by raising your glass with the traditional ‘Up Yours!’ (John Whitworth); the English countryside has many quaint rural activities — ask one of the locals where you can go ‘cottaging’ (Nicholas Stone).

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