Whoever wins the election, three things are certain: borrowing is going to rise, taxes are going to have to go up – and there will be a lot more trees. There may even be enough trees to replace those lost to produce all those Lib Dem election leaflets and bogus newspapers.
The election campaign has descended into a manic contest to see who can promise to plant the largest number of trees. The Conservatives have promised 30 million a year for five years, the Lib Dems have upped that to 60 million. The Greens have chipped in with 70 million a year for ten years. Never to be outdone, Labour has promised 100 million trees a year for 20 years. So there.
It is all beginning to look like a Monty Python sketch. That’s nothing, the Tories should now say: we’re going to plant 10 billion trees, until there is one coming out of every chimney pot.

Britain’s best politics newsletters
You get two free articles each week when you sign up to The Spectator’s emails.
Already a subscriber? Log in
Comments
Join the debate, free for a month
Be part of the conversation with other Spectator readers by getting your first month free.
UNLOCK ACCESS Try a month freeAlready a subscriber? Log in