The prospect of Gordon Brown becoming PM should fill all sane people with dread

The last time I wrote about the deranged, unEnglish and presbyterian socialism which Gordon Brown longs to inflict upon us, I had a letter from a doctor. He said my piece was basically worthless because it had missed the fundamental point. ‘Mr Brown,’ the doctor wrote, ‘has Asperger’s Syndrome.’ Not being a medical man, I asked the most brilliant doctor of my acquaintance what he thought. ‘He’s just being rude,’ said my Second Opinion. ‘I’m sure he hasn’t.’ Neither doctor, to the best of my knowledge, knows the Chancellor. I am sure Mr Brown is not autistic. However, the Second Opinion provided me with details of the symptoms of Asperger’s. They include: ‘Lacking the intuitive ability to understand that other people have feelings and that they think thoughts that may be different.’ Hm. And then: ‘Because of difficulty in empathy and in reading and using non-verbal signals and in understanding levels of intimacy …may appear impulsive, rude, socially disorientated.’ Interesting. ‘May have obsessive topics of conversation and interest, insisting on rules, behavioural disorientation even with minor change and must complete work and insist on routines. This may look like non-compliant or oppositional behaviour or perfectionism.’

You need spend just a few moments with the Chancellor to appreciate that he is a monomaniac. Deeply informed by his convictions, he is so convinced of his rectitude that he seems to think those with a different opinion must require psychiatric help. Because he is clever and can, when his ambitions require it, be selectively, devastatingly charming, he is impressive in an almost religiose way. He is obsessed with his destiny. He is, frankly, a bit weird. He may before long be prime minister. What then?

The Brown camp has in the last few days accused ‘the usual suspects’ of seeking to destabilise him by speculating about his Cabinet, his plotting with John Prescott, and the mortality of Mr Blair.