The mindlessness of mindfulness

I was at the Way with Words literary festival in Devon last week, reading from my new book. Afterwards I was led to the authors’ tent to do signings. As I approached I was delighted to see a long queue snaking around the gardens, everyone clutching my book, eagerly waiting for me to sign them. As I bounded up to my assigned desk like an overexcited puppy, my face fell. The queue was for Linda Blair’s The Key to Calm: Your Path to Mindfulness – and Beyond, the latest tome on the self-indulgence and narcissism that is ‘mindfulness’.

Rudely ignoring the small group of dungaree-clad lesbians waiting for me to sign the paltry pile of books on my turf, I picked up a copy of The Key to Calm to see what all the fuss was about. ‘Linda Blair’s proven programme will teach you how to find the balance, purpose and tranquillity you seek and enable you to find calm,’ read the blurb.