The dangers of vegetarianism

I do not doubt that hot weather occasioned by climate change is the primary cause of the many wildfires we have seen in the UK this summer. But I wonder if they have also become more profuse as a consequence of various authorities desperately attempting to make the countryside more ‘accessible’ to people who, in truth, shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near it.

The more you encourage the dregs of humanity to visit ‘green spaces’, the more likely it is that they will turn up and ruin them. This is a social class of extremely low intelligence but, concomitantly, a vast gustatory appetite – they are unable to go more than 20 minutes without gnawing or slurping something. That explains why they always take with them on these unwise expeditions a disposable barbecue in order to cook their revolting sausages and burgers. Discarded barbecues have caused many of the fires you will have seen reported on your news programmes, and the fire service has demanded they be banned.