Laura Freeman Laura Freeman

The bad boys of Naples

Turns out stone-throwing is the sexting of the south

issue 09 September 2018

Goodnight, Caecilius. Goodnight, Metella. Farewell, faithful Cerberus the dog. What a fate. Buried under the ash and rock at Pompeii. ‘Eheu,’ as they say in the Cambridge Latin Course. ‘Oh dear, oh no.’

But what’s this? A boat leaving the Bay of Naples… A young man on board… Coughing black dust, but… alive. Yes, it’s Quintus, sailing to safety and Book Two. Here we will learn about Quintus’s further adventures in Roman Britain, trips to the baths at Aquae Sulis and an audience with good King Cogidubnus.

What fun we had with Caecilius and Co. What bread, what circuses. What larks with Grumio and Clemens, the two buffoonish slaves. Parents who were taught classics by Loeb and Liddell & Scott looked down on the Cambridge Latin Course. Graphic novels with added gerunds.

But if you learnt Porto, Portas, Portat on the mean streets of Pompeii, then the words ‘Caecilius est in horto’ will give you a thrill.

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