Greetings from Sheffield where yours truly has been put in charge of The Tory Revival In Our Great Northern Cities!
Was feeling a bit down about things yesterday after a number of rather indiscreet comments from voters at the Meadowhall shopping centre about where I should put my lovely green leaflets but today things are looking up! Rang in for conference call this morning and our northern supremo Mr Bridges said it looks like we are going to win a council seat in Manchester! Mr Pickles has worked it all out.
Everyone still a bit nervous because Mr Pickles has predicted wacky things before. Like the time he said we weren’t going to win a single seat out of 10,000 in a bid to “manage expectations”.
But all in all, I feel there’s no need for me to bother the good people of Sheffield a second longer – they seem pretty happy voting Lib Dem – so I’m off to Top Shop to browse through the Kate Moss discount rack.
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