Straight talk

Lesbian tourism has long been a thing — women who once kissed a girl trying to appear more interesting while living a heterosexual life. Anne Heche, Madonna, Britney Spears and Ariana Grande have used lesbian/bisexual hints to titillate fans and sell more records.

But nothing riles me like the Miley Cyrus approach which is to be heterosexual, married to a man, but claiming to be ‘queer’ and edgy. In a recent interview about her marriage to Liam Hemsworth, she said: ‘We’re redefining, to be fucking frank, what it looks like for someone that’s a queer person like myself to be in a hetero relationship.’

What a load of pretentious baloney. Cyrus is as heterosexual as the next woman. Labelling herself ‘queer’ is as convincing as me deciding my dog is a goldfish. While I get the envy that many women feel towards those of us that shop around the corner, it is a bit low to want the attention for being ‘special’ while being boringly straight.