Steerpike Steerpike

Steerpike at the Tories’: Happy birthday, Prime Minister

What gift do you buy for a man who has it all? It would be hard enough to pick a forty-sixth birthday present for the multi-millionaire David Cameron even if he were not the prime minister; but the fact that he is one of the leaders of the free world makes it even trickier.

Boris went with the gift of loyalty this morning, managing to get the conference floor to eat out of the palms of his hands and also heap praise on David Cameron. ‘If I am a mop, Dave, then you are the broom… sweeping away the mess left by Labour.’ George Osborne is the ‘dustpan’ in Boris’s cleaning cupboard; I bet he’ll love that.

There are physical presents, too. I hear that an old staff list from the Conservative Research Department in the early nineties has been dug out. The list apparently notes that one David Cameron is ‘arriving soon’. This old document has been framed and will be given to the PM, presumably to hang in his downstairs loo.

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