Standing Room | 11 July 2009

I’ve been reprimanded three times this week for ‘inappropriate behaviour’ — issued with a trio of verbal ‘warnings’.

I’ve been reprimanded three times this week for ‘inappropriate behaviour’ — issued with a trio of verbal ‘warnings’. None were handed out by law-enforcers — all came from members of the public. Random do-gooders. Total strangers have found the time, energy and self-importance to publicly tick me off for micro-misdemeanours. It’s a trend. Social vigilantes are the new police.

The first time I got told off I was parking outside my house. As I reversed, I was suddenly aware that I had an audience. A middle-aged couple were silently observing me. They weren’t threatening, they weren’t waiting to mug me — they were just standing on the pavement watching. Their fascination was vaguely disconcerting, and by mistake I lightly ‘bumper-touched’ my husband’s car parked directly behind me. My silent witness nudged his wife and then mimed for me to wind down my window.