Taki Taki

Sex, lies and videotape

Broadsides from the pirate captain of the Jet Set

issue 02 October 2004

New York

Except for the people, this is a wonderful time of year to be in the Bagel. Summer’s blistering heat has gone the way of Britain’s Davis Cup hopes — tiny Austria, using natives, has just eliminated big-bully Britain, which was using Gurkhas like Rusedski — the days are getting shorter but crisper, and Mother Nature is putting on quite a display of colours. Shades of yellow, red and gold, and orange are the order of the day. Autumn is by far the most colourful time of the year in the Bagel. It also inspires people.

Take, for example, Paris Hilton, the monosyllabic hotel heiress. She has just joined Flaubert, Charles Spencer (Diana’s little brother) and Papa Hemingway as an author. The opus is titled Confessions of an Heiress, and its style makes it obvious that Paris had Teddy Kennedy take her English high-school exams for her.

‘Never be too easy,’ she advises; ‘play hard to get.’

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