Sex and Society: A sad scene

Miles Douglas on the jealousy, ageism and sexual intrigue of gay men’s lives

A few months ago I persuaded one of my oldest and best gay friends to invite his lively, articulate heterosexual neighbours to dinner. The meal was, as I had expected, a great success. Conversation was amusing, flowed naturally along with the wine, and covered an impressive range of subjects. Like any good dinner party, it left a warm afterglow. I have had a long and, many would say, complicated relationship with my host, and later that night I asked him to admit that the party was far more successful than his many all-gay evenings. He did so, somewhat wistfully, and then fell back into a ‘what’s-a-chap-to-do?’ fatalism. ‘The trouble is, we have to live in the gay world,’ he said, and by no means for the first time. ‘We have no choice.’

If we believe the media and our own wishful thinking, this is the best-ever time to be gay.