It’s no good. We’ve been putting up with weird character changes, laughably unconvincing plotlines, calculating theatricals for a while now. But life in Ambridge has now plunged into the danger zone. If we don’t rise up in protest, The Archers is doomed, destined for broadcasting oblivion, killed off by a flash flood of OTT dramatics.
There were warning signs as soon as Ambridge Extra was launched on Radio 4 Extra with a mission to update life in the Borsetshire village, make it more appealing to younger listeners, provide a hinterland for all those minor characters whose names we knew but from whom we never heard — Freda, Ryan, Sabrina. Things in Ambridge changed, just ever so slightly. Alice turned into a careless flirt; beer in the Bull was abandoned in favour of cocktails at Jaxx; new Horrobins emerged from nowhere as if the family from hell was a 21st-century Hydra whose heads kept increasing without number.
Most popular
Charles Walford
Forget Adolescence: this is the Netflix drama teenage boys should watch
But then John Yorke arrived from EastEnders to take over the editor’s role and sharpen up the action. Within days, Tony had a heart attack, Adam was almost bludgeoned to death by sheep-rustlers but made a miraculous recovery and is now having it off with one of the fruit-pickers from Poland, Brookfield was set alight by a blackmailing arsonist, and Vicky, yes Vicky, that chubby brunette from Borchester who carried Mike off to the altar and must be well over 50, announced that she’s pregnant. No wonder poor Mike is off his milk.
Mr Yorke, you just don’t get it. You’re supposed to give us subtle signs of a major plot development weeks in advance so we can guess what’s about to happen, giving ourselves the sensation that we’re in control and that nothing happens without us being able to predict it.
Comments
Join the debate for just £1 a month
Be part of the conversation with other Spectator readers by getting your first three months for £3.
UNLOCK ACCESS Just £1 a monthAlready a subscriber? Log in