Rescued by reindeer

‘Something about the idea of being a travel writer distresses me,’ laments Jenny Diski in the introduction of her book. ‘So,’ she continues, ‘this is not a travel book.’ Well, distressing as this news may be to both author and reader, this is a travel book. All travel writers have their foibles. Some wish to delight their audience with tales of dangerous adventure. Others strive to amuse their public with wry and witty observations. Jenny Diski’s sole purpose is to do nothing. She wants to keep still.

Her deeply uninspiring book slithers into action when she jets off to New Zealand to attend an International Writers’ Festival. Hey-ho, what a drag. The thoughtless organisers of this festival have the temerity to expect our hapless heroine to attend lunches, launches and cocktail parties. How dare they pay for her flight and set her up in a posh hotel when anyone can see that all she wants to do is stay at home and be left in peace? When she is able to escape this tiresome social whirl, Jenny spends her time e-mailing a friend at home, ‘complaining about being jet-lagged and overwrought’.