Melissa Kite Melissa Kite

Real life | 5 February 2011

Melissa Kite's Real life

issue 05 February 2011

My local minicab firm has installed an automated booking system. This means ordering a taxi now generates so much bureaucracy that I have to factor in an extra ten minutes to my morning routine so I can process all the red tape.

It is no longer a case of simply ringing up and speaking to a bored-sounding bloke with a crackling headset. Now, a snazzy recorded message by a movie-trailer voiceover man set to elevator musak greets you with a series of suggestions about where a cab might take you and gives you a lengthy mission statement explaining that the aim of this minicab firm is to deliver you to your destination in comfort and safety (as opposed to carting you about in agony and peril), that they have developed a groundbreaking in-house database, also for your comfort and safety, and that they are CRB-checked and follow tried and tested lost property procedures…you guessed it, for your comfort and safety.

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