‘How did I get here?’ I think dazedly. I am sitting in the Big Yellow Self Storage in Balham being interviewed, there is no other word for it. The person interviewing me is a relentlessly cheerful girl who wants to know everything, there is no other word for it, about me before she rents me a storeroom. But not only that, she wants to know everything about something she is ominously calling ‘my storage needs’.
As I deliberate on the prices and options, she announces: ‘This is about making sure it’s the right decision for yourself.’
I want to store a piano for a month. I’m not choosing a pension plan. But I don’t say this. I just sit there thinking the world has gone mad and I wish I could get out of it all somehow.
I wish I didn’t have to witness this girl’s enthusiasm for storage, or storage solutions as she calls it.
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