Real life | 19 October 2017

Although it seemed unlikely, I did not immediately dismiss the possibility of a hit and run skip lorry. The witness reports were clear: they came to empty my skip, couldn’t manage it, smashed the street to smithereens and drove off.

I came home from town that evening, drove up the track in the dark and there was the one and only street light illuminating the line of houses where I live — a nice traditional old thing like a gas lamp — knocked halfway to the floor. It listed dangerously, having stopped just short of crashing through my front window or the one next door.

At any moment, perhaps it would complete its trajectory and electrocute either the next-door neighbours as they sat watching Coronation Street, or the spaniels sitting on the sofa waiting faithfully for me to come home. A Skanska lorry was already on the scene, and an engineer was assessing the situation.