Real life | 16 June 2012

You know you’re getting old when the pharmacist puts your medications in a carrier bag.

‘Here you are, dear,’ said the nice lady, who works behind the counter at my local chemist. And she handed me a bag. Now, the exact dimensions of this bag are crucial. I’ve measured it. It is 30cm long, or nearly 12 inches for those of you not yet participating in the metric era. Or for those who think more literally than that, it is a foot long. A whole foot, including toes. As to the width, we’re talking 21cm or eight and a quarter inches.

But that isn’t the worst bit. The worst bit is that the bag has handles. Handles, I tell you!

I am now so decrepit, my medications can only be borne through the streets if they are housed in a large, stiff paper bag with handles and a reinforced bottom.