Melissa Kite Melissa Kite

Real life | 16 February 2017

The floor plan doesn’t match the flat, and the Land Registry doesn’t do kinky, so the sale’s off

issue 18 February 2017

Fine, so I got it completely wrong. It turns out the sale of my flat was not held up by a wiggle in the garden, but by a kink in the kitchen. This kink in the kitchen is far more serious than a wiggle in the garden. I should have realised that, the buyer’s solicitor has complained.

I don’t know why I got the idea that exchange of contracts had been delayed by a mistake in the plan for the garden, but I’m struggling to keep up. I’ve been deluged with complaints about absolutely everything I had thought was fine. From the crisp new electrical safety certificates to the diligently maintained boiler service history, nothing has been good enough.

I’m sure someone told me at some stage that the garden fence didn’t follow the right line, but it now transpires that no one is bothered by that at all. It’s the kink in the kitchen that’s causing merry hell.

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