The Bupa Blooper. In years to come, that is how I shall refer to what happened when I inadvertently cancelled my health insurance policy, with what certain people seemed to think were hilarious consequences. It all began when my policy came up for renewal and I tried to change my direct debit mandate so that the monthly payments were taken from a different account. I know, that way madness lies. Never, ever change your direct debit for anything unless you are prepared to send the whole thing to hell in a handcart.
But they gave me the impression that changing my bank details would be perfectly straightforward. They sent me a form, I filled it in, posted it back in the pre-paid envelope, and waited a few weeks before cancelling the old direct debit, which I assumed was now defunct. I see now that to take such a trusting course of action was purest madness.
Three months later, I was going through my accounts when I realised that no money had been transferred to Bupa since the renewal date. I rang them in a state of apoplexy: ‘What on earth has happened to my policy since the payments stopped?’
‘What policy?’ said the deadpan Bupa operative.
‘My health policy. The one I’ve had for ten years.’
‘That policy has lapsed.’
It turns out that if you suddenly cancel your direct debit instruction, Bupa cancels your health policy without ringing to check there hasn’t been some mistake. Of course they don’t call to talk you round. Why should they ponder the reasons for you suddenly leaving them days after painstakingly negotiating your renewal? They can’t be expected to wonder whether they or the Royal Mail might have lost the blasted envelope with your new direct debit instruction inside.
After a lot of screaming, I was told to hold the line.
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