PMQs sketch: And they’re back

‘Don’t gloat’. Cameron trotted along to the Commons today with this commandment ringing in his ears. He nearly managed it. But his manner betrayed his state of mind. There was an audible zing, an irrepressible sunniness in his voice as he inaugurated his second term. ‘This morning I had meetings with ministerial colleagues and others.’ Rarely has that formula held such a fizzy, cocaine kick.

Labour’s acting leader, for now, is Harriet Harman. Is she about to pack it in? She seemed passionless and out of sorts. A scowl kept stealing across her lips as she delivered her joke-free lines. She was like a disgruntled lady mayoress opening a fete in a June downpour. Come on Hattie! That’s not the Labour way. Not at all. True believers know that defeat at the polls is magnificent. Rejection is sublime. It’s an opportunity to crack open a bottle or two and hail the far-reaching reforms that have been stolen, yet again, from a hapless electorate by evil, scheming Tories.