Isabel Hardman Isabel Hardman

PMQs: Keir Starmer’s questionable parliamentary language

(Photo: UK Parliament/Jessica Taylor)

Keir Starmer was clearly keen today to make sure people remembered what is normally a rather pointless PMQs session before an economic statement. The Labour leader did so by using slightly questionable language, calling Boris Johnson ‘half-arsed’.

MPs will debate whether or not this was parliamentary language (he couldn’t have called the Prime Minister a ‘stoolpigeon’ or ‘pecksniffian’, so he had clearly chosen his words carefully). His reason for accusing Johnson of this was that he didn’t think the Prime Minister had fully engaged with the case of the 800 sacked P&O ferry workers. The pair had a rather impatient exchange on this matter, with Starmer repeatedly saying Johnson didn’t understand or care about what was going on and the Prime Minister accusing him of reading out ‘scripted’ questions that didn’t take into account his previous answers.

The Speaker didn’t upbraid Starmer and the language will stick

Starmer’s opening gambit was that if the Prime Minister couldn’t stop the sackings, ‘what’s the point of his government?’ Johnson started out strongly with his answers, revealing that the government believed P&O had broken two laws, both of which, he emphasised, had been brought in by Conservatives in government. He later said ministers were seeking to close a loophole in the 1998 minimum wage legislation which left seafarers vulnerable to being paid below the legal minimum.

Starmer tried to contrast the government’s level of motivation over this with the way Johnson had sought to tear up the rules to help Owen Paterson. He also claimed a memo containing advanced warning of the sackings was sent to Transport Secretary Grant Shapps and to the Prime Minister. ‘But they didn’t lift a finger to stop it,’ he said. ‘Did the Prime Minister not understand the memo, or did he just not bother to read it?’

When Johnson said he found out on the day that P&O dismissed its workers, the Labour leader retorted: ‘I take it from that answer the Prime Minister didn’t read his WhatsApp briefing.’ This was a reference to reports that Johnson prefers short briefings via WhatsApp rather than hefty papers in his prime ministerial red box.

Johnson insisted that the government was doing the right thing but that it would never seek to ‘pitchfork away’ overseas investment in the UK. Starmer then accused Johnson of a ‘pathetic’ response to the case, adding that he was ‘hoisting the white flag’. Starmer finished by saying: ‘Why does the Prime Minister think they will take a crumb of comfort from his half-arsed bluster and waffle today?’ There were some sounds of indignation from the benches behind Johnson as he responded, but the Speaker didn’t upbraid Starmer and the language will stick.

The other line that will stick from today’s session is that Johnson made an unusual intervention in the debate about sex and gender, telling one of his own MPs that he thought ‘when it comes to distinguishing between a man and a woman that the basic facts of biology remain important’. This sort of statement is the matter of furious debate across politics, and has left many of the Labour frontbench in knots. But it is something Johnson has largely stayed away from, not least because of splits within his own top team on the question. It was a second line that made today’s session unusually memorable.

Isabel Hardman
Written by
Isabel Hardman
Isabel Hardman is assistant editor of The Spectator and author of Why We Get the Wrong Politicians. She also presents Radio 4’s Week in Westminster.

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