Power hasn’t altered Sir Keir Starmer. His frosty and unamused demeanour remains. No hint of warmth or joy has penetrated his defensive outer rind. He still looks like a mourner-for-hire at an oligarch’s funeral.
Today at PMQs he was faced by a quick-witted and forceful Rishi Sunak who clearly relishes the role of battering ram. The Tories may start to question the wisdom of replacing him. Which of their leadership candidates could match this masterclass in how to grill an incumbent PM? Rishi selected a single issue and hammered away at it until he got a useless reply. Then, having described how useless it was, he moved onto a new question.
Today he managed to prohibit just one activity. A very low tally
His beef was the financial choices made by the government, which wants to scrap fuel subsidies for pensioners while awarding big pay rises to train drivers who already make £65,000 a year. Sir Keir blamed the ‘mess’ left by the Tories and the ‘back hole of £22 billion’. Both excuses already feel threadbare. And he advertised the low take-up rate for pension credit which goes unclaimed by 800,000 potential beneficiaries.
Rishi shone a light on Sir Keir’s murky morality. ‘The government doesn’t have to choose to take money off low-income pensioners,’ he said. ‘He simply can’t explain why he has made that choice.’ No. But he’ll have to keep trying.
Sir Keir is much happier when it comes to banning things. Today he managed to prohibit just one activity. A very low tally. He’ll probably make up for it tomorrow.
Sir Alistair Carmichael of the Lib Dems complained that wind turbines on his patch are being switched off during surges in supply even though the power firms keep receiving payments. He found this baffling. And he seemed convinced that his constituents were being cheated in some way. Sir Keir acknowledged that the practice is normal: ‘National Grid does regulate the grid occasionally,’ he said. But he’s had enough of it. ‘That’s not acceptable,’ he announced, blaming it all on the Tories. ’It’s a problem that wasn’t fixed over the last 14 years. … We’re determined to fix it.’
A Labour backbencher brought up mental health and Sir Keir declared that 8,500 new workers are about to swing into action. Doing what, though? Perhaps depression and anxiety are about to be banned as well.
Oasis fell briefly under Sir Keir’s pitiless eye. Labour backbencher Emma Foody complained that a ticketing website has hiked its charges to reflect soaring demand for the Oasis reunion. That’s capitalism, of course, and Foody dislikes it. ‘Urgent action is needed,’ she said. She wants a regulated system to ‘put fans at the heart of live music’. Sir Keir seemed momentarily unsure whether to ban Oasis or to nationalise them. Instead he echoed the questioner’s soundbite, word for word. ‘Put fans at the heart of live music,’ he repeated, as if he’d recorded it in advance.
The Speaker called ‘Shred Davey’ which seems to be his new nickname for the Lib Dem leader. Shred unfolded a tragic story about a loving husband, Norman, who cares for his wife, Roz, as she fights a battle against two incurable diseases. Because they miss the qualifying threshold by a few pennies, Norman and Roz aren’t poor enough to receive help with their fuel bills. What comfort can Sir Keir offer them?
The PM will never find a satisfactory answer to this question except to mention, yet again, that 800,000 older people don’t claim pension credit. And the more he talks about fuel allowances the more he will encourage new applicants to collect this little-known benefit.
Sir Keir has double-whammied himself. His attempt to save cash by freezing Granny will cost him a fortune. And his reputation as a caring leader is already shot to bits.
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