Nigel Farage is just Russell Brand for old people

Yes, yes, yes, some young ‘uns support UKIP. Just as a few black people do too. But come on. We all know – because the polling tells us so – that UKIP supporters are likely to be older and whiter than the average voter and, most importantly, also more certain that the whole bleedin’ country is going to the dogs. The sodding dogs, I tell you.

It isn’t.

Of course there are problems. Of course there are great injustices that need correcting. Of course there are difficult, often intractable, policy debates that resist easy answers. There always have been and always will be. Change is always alarming and always unavoidable. Stuff happens and the job of real politicians is to manage that change.

Real politicians know this. Only phoneys pretend it isn’t. Only phoneys assert that with one bound we can be free and everything – everything! – will be better. Our glorious future will be assured if only we muster the nerve to rid ourselves of the scum who, though purporting to lead this great country, have betrayed it.