Milkshake me!

Nine days of campaigning to go and I haven’t been milkshaked yet. I’ve hung out near McDonald’s in the hope – anything to get ten seconds on the evening news. It seems that in my constituency, the rank, sanctimonious, narcissistic and dim-witted monomaniacs of the new, kind and gentle left are somewhat thin on the ground. Nigel Farage copped a milkshake early on, and members of rival political parties and the BBC tried to pretend they were concerned. It didn’t work with the
BBC because when the side-splitting but fabulously unfunny comedienne Jo Brand suggested it would be better to throw battery acid at Farage, she was not sacked or even suspended. That kind of remark, along with the ginger-growlered Angela Rayner referring to Tories, unapologetically, as ‘scum’, give succour to the morons with their milkshakes – as well as the other morons with their machetes or guns. It is depressing to think that these people will be hopping up and down with delight on 5 July.