Memo to Mr CTB esq. (Strictly confidential)

Dear Mr CTB,

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Lloyd Evans

We saw the real Keir Starmer at PMQs – and it was ugly

We often say that the best advice a solicitor can give a client is to tell them when to back off from a confrontation. The time has come to give it to you. You must know that your cause is hopeless, and our so-called privacy injunction a laughing stock. Your name is all over Twitter, Facebook and the Scottish press. Millions of people, including your team-mates and your wife, know about your affair with Imogen Thomas. Frankly, if we had broadcast your liaison in adverts on national television, we would have made a better job of protecting your secrets.
    
You think it cannot get any worse. Trust us, it can.
  
At present, you are merely an object of ridicule. If we go ahead with contempt of court proceedings, you will become a target for loathing.