
The Horsey Life, by Simon Barnes
Dolly Dolores was a big-bottomed mare with a white star on her forehead who loved to jump. Simon Barnes experienced an instant connection with her on his first ride. He had never owned a horse before, but his wife persuaded him to buy her. He spent a royalty cheque on her. She was always a lively ride. At first Barnes just gave Dolores her head and let her do what she wanted. She was an ace jumper, never refused, never ran out — one of those rare horses with a passion for jumping. Barnes competed in cross-country events (though he is modest about this) and he started winning prizes, but then Dolores began to behave in a weird manner. She stood up on her hind legs and refused to move. People advised him to have her shot. He did what any horse-lover would do and put her into foal.
At one level, this is Dolores’s story. But of course Barnes is too good a writer to leave it at that. He sets up a riff between his own lifestory and the mare’s tale. Barnes came to riding as an adult and a townie. He started in his twenties on livery-stable hacks in Richmond Park, and he learned properly when he was living in Hong Kong. Country children may smile to hear that his biggest thrill is to go for a ride alone in the countryside, but he has a point when he says that grown-up novices are more likely to think things out for themselves, rather than blindly accept the cavalry/pony club rules. He claims that as a journalist he lives on adrenalin and a short fuse, and in the company of horses he finds a part of himself that is calm and serene.

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