Frank Keating

Just the one

This week they named the men to defend the Ashes

issue 16 September 2006

This week they named the men to defend the Ashes. The trumpets of 12 months ago are muted, the martial drumbeats muffled. It has not been a good year. I fear the worst. England’s batting now looks fitful, the bowling feckless. Of the three champions, the flighty daredevil Pietersen might win you a Test match, but not a whole series; ditto the moody fast bowler Harmison; and the dynamic Flintoff’s fitness will be a worry all winter. After a few one-dayer warm-ups in India, the first Test match begins in Brisbane on 23 November. We shall see what we shall see, but I fancy the Australians are feeling more smug than usual.

Meanwhile, here’s a pub quiz XI for you, off the top of my head, not even bothering Wisden. What has this team in common? John Stephenson, Mark Benson, Andy Lloyd, Alan Butcher, James Whitaker, Paul Parker, Tony Pigott, Joey Benjamin, Mike Smith and, of course, the two grunting, hirsute Sidebottoms, père Arnie and fils Ryan, who both bowled their boots off for England (till the blood seeped through) and then were asked no more.

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