Jeremy Corbyn cuts a sorry figure at PMQs

Jeremy Corbyn now cuts the sorriest figure in Westminster. The crackle has gone out of his cornflakes. The chain is rusty, the tyres are flat, the mechanism can barely move. Like Big Ben itself, this old bell has lost its clapper.

The Labour leader still inspires a vocal greeting at PMQs but it’s the sort of semi-ironic ovation that might greet a fat schoolkid as he completes the 100m in just under two minutes. When Corbyn speaks he recites his questions in a zestless drone. And yet a great opportunity is being missed. Labour’s leadership candidates should take turns to spar with Boris as part of the contest. But no. We’re stuck with a man who wouldn’t even pass an audition to play himself.

The leaders squared up over NHS spending which the Tories plan to increase. By how much? Not enough, of course. That’s Labour’s eternal position. Boris could promise to spend the entire government budget on health and Corbyn would read out a fault-finder’s report complaining that such paltry sums are bound to starve the NHS to death.