It’s not cruel to shout at dogs

‘Missing Dog, Please Do Not Call, Chase or Try To Grab Her!! She Will Run!!’

This notice, featuring the face of a cavalier spaniel, is once again pinned around the village where I live and all the neighbouring villages, country lanes and roadsides. I say again, because about six months ago an identical message was pinned up everywhere, but featuring another missing dog incident.

Is there a template for these missing dog notices, because they all seem to say the same daft thing, in Surrey anyway? ‘Do not call, chase or try to grab.’ Yes, that’s kind of why you lost your dog in the first place. I think you’ll find it was the lack of calling, chasing or trying to grab that led to your poor pooch becoming destitute.

What is wrong with dog owners nowadays? They have this new fangled idea that even calling a dog is wrong, because you are raising your voice.