Rod Liddle says that Northern Ireland’s First Minister and his wife held religious beliefs that made ordinary life — and marriage — impossible
Help me out here — we need a wholesale supplier, and quickly. If we are to save the soul of Iris Robinson, we need huge vats of the blood of Christ, in which she might humbly immerse herself. I have tried eBay and — ironically, you might think — the Vatican, but there seems to be a run on the blood of Christ right now — we are all after a sprinkling, here or there, to assuage our multifarious sins. Total immersion — which would require gallons of the stuff — is thus out of the question for Iris. But perhaps there might be some aerosol blood of Christ product, a sort of Presbyterian fundamentalist Cillit Bang! which might at least ameliorate the problem. Reader, I am still searching. We should not give up.
One of the problems is that Iris Robinson once ordered bulk supplies of the Blood of Christ © in order to sort out the awful poof problem. Iris was — and maybe still is — of the conviction that homosexuals were depraved and disgusting, foul and repellant, but that this business notwithstanding, they could redeem themselves with swift application of the Blood of Christ ©. Hence a run on the product. She is thus doubly hoist by her own petard — once for encouraging the bulk purchase of Blood of Christ © products to deal with the queers, and second for being a bigot.
She was always quite hard on the poofs, Iris, as I have pointed out. Her religion, or ideology, called for her to be quite hard on adulterers too, although she never quite stepped up to the plate on this one.
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