Inside the Conservatives’ secret ‘black-and-white’ ball

The Conservatives have their black-tie billionaire-laden black-and-white ball tonight – an event shrouded in secrecy. So your spy, Mr Steerpike, is live-blogging it. I’ve already noticed a porn baron or two amongst the guests. But for all of the jolity, where is the cash? The commodity/emerging market crash seems to have hit the pockets of the bidders rather hard. Either that, or they think ten years of Tory government are in the bag. Here’s the live blog:-

10.40pm Things are drawing to a close now – MPs who haven’t been drinking have just done a runner. Perhaps humiliated, on Cameron’s behalf, at the paltry sums that this auction has raised. Cameron himself doesn’t look like he’s having too much fun. Black and white – and red with embarrassment.

10.30pm Oh dear. The sums are more like a church auction than a Tory plutocrat ball. A “personalised composition by Julian Gallant” has just gone for £400. He’s a famed concert pianist and conductor: this time last year, it would have gone for £4,000.