Information superhighwaymen

I occasionally worry that future scholars will be unable to write my biography because of my failure to keep a diary. But it seems I need not be too bothered. There came a moment last week when I realised there will be more than enough information for them to piece together my life in all its excruciatingly tedious detail.

That moment came when my wife, who has recently enrolled on a part-time, one-day-a-week course at a former polytechnic, showed me a two-page ‘medical centre database’ form which she had been ordered to complete before she could begin her studies. ‘Have you ever taken illegal drugs or solvents?’ it asked. ‘Have you ever been pregnant?’ ‘Do you use any form of contraception? If yes, which method?’ It went on to demand that she disclose the ‘average number of units of alcohol drunk per week’, broken down into ‘beer/lager/cider’, ‘wine’, ‘spirits’ and ‘alcopops’.