Charlotte Gill

In defence of baby Cyanide

I’ve always been slightly jealous of people with unusual names. It’s the sort of envy that happens when you miss out. Which I did, in 1989 when my parents decided to call me Charlotte.

Little did they know it would become the most common name for girls that year. Even in 2016, Charlotte is the third most popular choice, no thanks to the arrival of the latest royal.

You wouldn’t think this would be a problem, but this title has caused ample confusion in my life, particularly as I must compete with two other writers called Charlotte Gill. One sometimes gets my emails and, in such moments, I resent that I was not called Apple, or Princess, or had Frank Zappa for a dad.

They often get mocked these celebrities, for choosing wacky titles for their offspring. Pop singer Kelly Clarkson has been ridiculed this week for naming her son Remington.

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