How to avoid paying London’s Ulez charge

It’s getting hard to escape low emission zones. In Birmingham, Oxford and Bristol – and pretty soon the whole of London – unless your vehicle is squeaky clean, you are going to have to pay every day that you drive. London–based readers probably know by now of Transport for London’s plans to expand its £12.50-a-day Ultra Low Emission Zone (Ulez) to every single borough, from Hayes to Hornchurch, Cheshunt to Caterham, and with a sticky-out bit which I think has been deliberately designed to include Chessington World of Adventures.

For many, this is an outrage. The Conservative MP for Carshalton and Wallington, Elliot Colburn, has described himself as ‘very, very angry’, calling the expansion a ‘disgusting move’. Those who are not angry are the families of the estimated 9,400 people who die prematurely each year from London’s air pollution. So this is an emotive subject.

I smoke, which places me in my own personal Ultra High Emission Zone, so I have no business lecturing anyone about air quality. Suffice to say that there is some debate as to the positive effect the expansion will have, given that TfL has admitted that there has been no noticeable drop in roadside pollution since Ulez was expanded to the North and South Circulars last year.

I am sympathetic to both sides of the argument, but I have to admit I am coming from an ‘I’m All Right, Jack’ position because I have not owned a car since 2007. I got burned by mistakenly straying into the Congestion Charge Zone too many times – despite the signage, it’s surprisingly easy to do – and then moved to Marylebone, where parking fees alone are more expensive, pro rata, than Eton, or that’s what it felt like.

But I pity the poor soul who can’t afford a clean or electric vehicle, and who lives in some benighted suburb of London where there is no Tube station, or the buses are infrequent, nonexistent, or don’t go anywhere you want.