How Bali realigned my chakras

I am not normally one for spirituality and my previous attempt at yoga rendered me a sorry heap on the living room floor. So I am perhaps an odd choice for a luxury wellness retreat to Bali. All I really knew about the island was that David Bowie – more in touch with his chakras and their relative misalignments than I – requested to be buried there. But having spent a week in Bali, I now understand where he was coming from.

My stay began at the St. Regis resort in Nusa Dua on the south side of the island. We arrived in the lobby to the sound of the rindik – a traditional bamboo xylophone – and were flanked on either side by rows of hotel staff, as if, I suggested at the time, we had just broken the record for the number of goals scored in a Premier League season.