Herbal remedies for horses? I’m half tempted to try them myself…

You know you’ve been irreversibly sucked into the ninth circle of horse-owning hell when you find yourself perusing an equine supplement catalogue. If you ask me, these tomes should have a disclaimer on the front saying, ‘Abandon all hope, ye pony-lovers who enter here.’ The equine supplement industry is a vast money-burning pit into which you shall surely fall unless you hold fast and stolidly remain the sort of owner who says ‘stuff and nonsense’ whenever anyone tries to tell you that horses have complementary medicinal needs.

I used to be extremely stolid. I once overheard a horse-owner in a stable yard telling a fellow livery: ‘My boy is loving his turmeric!’ And I decided there and then that I would never, ever — come colic, tie-up, busted tendons or knackered suspensory ligaments — entertain the notion of trying alternative equine remedies. As I listened to this nice lady describing how she was treating her nag’s lameness with a spice used in curry dishes, I made a mental note: ‘That way madness lies.