Francophobia

In Competition No. 2408 you were given an opening couplet — ‘Oh, plague of plagues! Wherever I turn, French tricks,/ French schemes, French morals, and French politics!’ — and invited to continue either in the modern or the 18th-century mode.

The opening couplet came from a contributor to Fraser’s Magazine, a Tory journal, in the late 18th century. Recently our own journal published a poem mocking the Scots, their national character and dress and Wee Frees, ending with the suggested ‘solution’ that they should all be permanently ghettoised behind Hadrian’s Wall. Despite the fact that it was signed by someone with a patently Scottish name, our editor shortly afterwards received a communication from the Race Relations Board informing him that the poem had drawn complaints but that the decision had been not to prosecute. I hope none of you end up in the dock as a result of this week’s light-hearted Frog-bashing.