Does everything give you cancer?

I’m sick of being scared by scientific studies

Tall women are more likely to get cancer. As research findings go, this has to be among the most randomly vindictive scientific conclusions ever to spill out of a university research department into a screaming newspaper headline, and lord knows there have been a few.

Women who breastfeed are less likely to have heart attacks or strokes. Women who don’t breastfeed are more likely to abuse children. Women who are stressed are more likely to have children with asthma (how stressful a piece of knowledge is that?). Men who are circumcised are more likely to suffer erectile problems. Children born to men aged over 35 are more likely to have a cleft lip or palate. Men are more likely to get cancer than women. Homosexual men are more likely to get cancer than heterosexual men. Circumcised men who have sex with women who drink one glass of wine a day during pregnancy are more likely to have a child with a club foot.